Project 365...TAKE TWO

So, I'm doing it again! I did it in 2009/2010, but never finished! It has been deleted now, I really really really wish they didn't delete albums that haven't been updated in a certain amount of time, because I'd love to look back.

So here it is: http://365project.org/jaimee365/365/2011-12-31

Here's to hoping I stay on top of it!! :)

Facebook..what gives?

So we've all seen them, at least most of us have, the top 10 things women, men, moms, etc, say/do on fb. They are pretty dead on, too. I read one about moms, and I reposted it on my FB because I found it interesting. It listed things such as wishing your kid(s) happy birthday, posting a bunch of pics of them, putting your kid(s) pic as your profile pic, advertising your "Mom" blog, asking for advice, etc. I was guilty of probably MOST of the things, and I think we all do it because we see our other mom friends do those things too. So, one particular friend of mine said she hates when people do those things, and has even deleted someone because of it. Now, I have to admit this type of response aggravated me because a.) I'm guilty of most of the list, as I stated above, and b.) why have that person on your friend list if something as simple as what they post about their experience in being a Mom gets them axed? and lastly, c.) I'm pretty sure I've seen her do some of these things. Do people really work themselves up like this over FB? These were all questions that came to my mind.

I'm not trying to make a hate blog against my said friend, but I'm truly just trying to figure out why people get so worked up over their friends status updates. I've come across a lot of people who are like this, and it irritates me. I suppose you could possibly say that one of the reasons is that I take it personally. I am a military wife, which means I don't have the luxury of being close to home, therefore, my main means of communication is FB. This may be sad to some people, but it works for me. I'm not even in the same country as my family, so now more than ever I want to utilize my FB to keep my friends and family updated on my life and also feel closer to them. But, I can't help but feel like I can't be open and say whatever I want. People are way too critical about it.

My advice for those who nag and complain about what your friends are posting, it is as simple as if you don't care that much, then delete them. Obviously, you don't care that much to be their friend if you don't want to hear what is going on in their life. FB also has this great option that lets you block what they post, so that it won't show up on your wall..but again, why are you keeping them as a friend, then?

This has bothered me for a long time, the feeling of not being able to post whatever on FB. I've wanted to blog about it for quite some time, and I guess when I posted that link on my FB page it just fired me up to write about it. It actually feels pretty good to put it in writing. And as far as my 'mommy blog' making it to FB, I no longer have it set up to automatically post anymore. Not just because it could annoy some of my 'friends', but mainly because I also have felt restricted on here as well. Now I'm letting loose, I'm tired of holding all of my feelings inside. I think better when I feel like no one is watching/reading. My mind opens up, and it's like therapy.

This past year has been difficult for me, more than anyone could know. I have been somewhat vocal, but no where near where it would reflect what I'm really feeling. I think for one of my New Year resolutions, I will be removing those who I feel don't need to be apart of my life anymore.

There's something about the coming of a new year..

There's something about the coming of a new year that makes some people apologize for things that they've done within that past year, or maybe within the past couple years. I know this personally because not long ago I sent a message to a friend who was a good friend of mine for years, apologizing for a falling out that we had, mostly because of the things I said to her. I couldn't see things from her perspective, and they didn't make sense to me. I wanted to help her, but ended up hurting her instead. I defriended her during that time, and went on with my life. Being military wives, and living so far apart, defriending her was the best thing I could have done back then, in my mind. Time went on, and a couple of months ago I felt like I wanted to make amends with people who I felt I needed to. She was the first person that popped up in my mind. In fact, she was the only person I felt I needed to apologize to. Sadly, I haven't heard back from her, but at least I know in my heart that I apologized to her and that's all I can do.

Karma works in funny ways because tonight I received a message from someone who said some pretty awful things to me awhile back, and she apologized. This was pretty unexpected. She said she would understand if I didn't give a response back to her, but she just wanted to be sure to apologize. I know the feeling exactly. And I'm very appreciative of her simple message to me.

2011 is coming to an end, it will never be again. 2012 will be a new start for everyone, if they choose to view it from that perspective. Don't hold grudges, with friends and ESPECIALLY with family, because life is precious and you never know when you can lose a person forever. I have spent my life thinking like this. Think how much happier you would be, too, if you apologized for things that you knew you were wrong for.

Life is too short and is pressure loaded as it is to hold a grudge and allow it to be a weight on your shoulders. It's not worth it.

HAPPY NEW YEAR, MAKE IT A GOOD ONE!!

Recurring Dream

I meant to write about this in my last blog, but I completely forgot.

So, I keep having this dream where I go back to my high school and get lost. I've had this dream so many times, it's crazy. But, it's different each time. The concept is the same, where I am always getting lost or I forget my schedule and end up being late to a class. However, different things happen, and my high school is a little different each time. For those that have went to Sandalwood, it's the same setup, only there are many halls in between the two main halls. It's more shapely as well, not so much a rectangle. It's also a lot more fancier.

In past dreams, I've been lost trying to go to gym class, history class, forgotten where I was going to, and today in my dream I got lost trying to find English class. It's so weird. People are crazy, and the classrooms are really really small. In one dream, I had to go to the dean's office to have them help me find my way.

After I finally found the class I was trying to get to, I remember getting picked up and going home on Atlantic. During the drive home, a DUCK flew in the window and grabbed my purse. The duck would NOT let go. I fought with it, when I finally decided to take all my stuff out(while the duck was biting me) and admit defeat. Right when I did that, the duck flew off and left my purse. After all of that craziness, Hailee and her cousin Lexi got out of the car and Hailee was on her scooter with a plastic red wagon(that we have) pulling Lexi, down Atlantic blvd on the road. I freaked about it because Atlantic Blvd is crazy, but also because that whole concoction was just NOT going to work! lol

AND then, I woke up. Pretty weird. Wish I knew what all of that means! Especially, the one where I go back to high school and keep getting lost. I'm sure it means something, since I keep having it.

Here is what one dream interpretation site says what it means to be dreaming that you are lost: Lost

To dream that you are lost suggests that you have lost your direction in life or that you have lost sight of your goals. You may be feeling worried and insecure about the path you are taking in life. If you try to call for help, then it means that you are trying to reach out for support. You are looking for someone to lean on. Alternatively, being lost means that you are still adjusting to a new situation in which the rules and conditions are ever changing.

............Which makes sense to me........

And here is the interpretation of having a duck in your dreams:

Duck

To see ducks in your dream, represent your spiritual freedom (if flying) or the unconscious (if swimming). They serve as a connection between the spiritual realm and the physical world. Ducks are multi-talented animals in that they can walk, swim and fly. Thus, a duck indicates your flexibility and your ability to blend and adapt in various situations. Alternatively, the dream suggests that you are setting yourself up or being set up for the kill as associated by the phrase "sitting duck". Are you being targeted? Also, the duck may be a pun on "ducking" some issue or situation, instead of confronting it head-on. Consider the phrase, "if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, it's a duck". Some things are too obvious to deny.

They kind of go hand in hand?

December Update

Our first major holiday-Thanksgiving- while being in another country has come and gone. It really isn't bad if you don't dwell that you aren't 'home' for it. And by home, I mean in the states. However, I learned that trick of the mind years ago when I had to get used to not actually being in Jacksonville for major holidays. My mother in law was here last week, and I'm sure that played a big part in the holiday not being so bad. We spent the whole week site seeing, including myself going to Ireland the day after Thanksgiving. I was pretty exhausted when I got home Saturday evening, I fell asleep as soon as I got out of the shower and laid on the couch. Then Sunday, we spent the day in London. It was awesome to see the Buckingham Palace and Big Ben. Those are sites I honestly never thought I would have seen in my lifetime, and there I was standing in front of them. It was surreal.

After flying across the ocean to move here, and having to board flights from Jax to Ohio, Ohio to VA, VA to DC, and then DC to London, I got over my anxiety of flying pretty quickly. Before we flew here, it had been about 15 years since I had flown anywhere. Then 9/11 happened, and all of that contributed to my fear of flying. I still have a little anxiety about flying, but not enough to hold me back anymore. That's why I went to Ireland! I'm so happy that I've gotten over my fear of flying because I feel like there's so much to see, and I want to see it!

I'm in the final weeks of this semester in school. In all honestly, I can't wait to be done. I want a little bit of my life back where I'm not consumed by assignments, discussions, quizzes/exams, and projects. I have 2 weeks left, and they are going to be some busy ones, but I'll get through it, and it'll be done and under my belt! It really is bittersweet because while I'm looking forward to getting on my own schedule again, I know that I need to keep going. But, it isn't an option right now as we can't financially pull it off. Cody is going to see what he can do, and maybe I can take classes again by next summer!

It is getting COOLD here. I had to scrape ice off of my windshield this morning before taking Hailee to school. I just know the snow will be coming soon. I'm really not looking forward to it! Right now, it is currently 43 degrees outside. BRRRR. ;)

There's my update for now, until next time......

Jaimee